Friday, February 24, 2012

An open letter to my son

It's Friday February 24th. That means in less than a month our lives will be completely different. I can not promise that you will like that change entirely but I will promise that we will be together every step of the way. You are my first born. Which, for some people means you are my mini me. In so many ways we are alike. Your maternal grandmother loves to remind me of this every chance she gets. You're curious, you're affectionate, you're inquisitive about relationships and what makes them tick. You're natural with rhythm and movement and like to compose your own songs. I could probably count and think so many attributes about us that make and I.

There are so many first for you and I since you are my first born. Does it make it any easier? Not in the slightest. I worry, fret, lament, rejoice over you. I cry with you....but not in front of you. I've been working on my poker face actually. But I do cry with you. I know that growing and learning is hard sometimes. Especially when I have to be mommy and be stern or firm about things. It may hurt for that moment but we love each other give kisses and hugs and are off to the next adventure in life. I am honored to be your mother. It means someone important upstairs thought I was worthy to share the Earthly experience with you. I get to learn patience, forgiveness(from you I always hope), joy and a list of adjectives I have yet to learn. The next 50, 60 years will change our dynamic many times over. I hope for the sake of my heart and probably for my health that you are always affection with me. So many friends of mine, who are also mothers, comment their children only want to cuddle if  they are sick. I have to ask you to let me get up from the couch. Which I don't find to be a burden at all. I wish everyone could have that, who wants it. You're eyes are so clear and so fresh to the world that you haven't been hurt by events yet, which makes me happy. You wake up everyday wanting an adventure even though I'm getting more and more tired by the day untill the big change happens. I am sorry for that but I will promise you that I will listen to your wonderful ideas and want to bask in the excitement of you discovering new ideas about the world.

I love every part of your handsome face. Your brown eyes with those super long eye lashes. Your smooth skin and awesome curls on your head. I love how you want to smile at everyone and want to know what their name is. Future politician I say but you could be anything you want to be. I love that your legs are getting longer and that you're getting taller. Love how you like to laugh real loud like me and that you're starting to enjoy saying jokes. I love that together you can make me a better parent. I just love you.

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